On a drizzle filled Friday, I decided to drive to the NYC Marriage Bureau, about 15 miles from West Orange, the town that Jumpstarts Love. I was there to see if the city would be interested in providing my marital education program to the hundreds of couples that enter their doors every day to tie the knot.
As I entered the double doors, the hair on my arms started to stand up. I thought it was strange since I was already married, but I couldn’t help but reflect back on my wedding 14+ years ago and all the preparations that went into making the day special. I just couldn’t get over the frenzy and excitement and future possibilities they were about to experience. The couples were all shapes, sizes and colors. They ranged from the being traditionally dressed to looking like they had just rolled over to the spot after a night out on the town.
One guy was nervous that his marriage wasn’t going to happen because his witness hadn’t showed up yet on this rainy afternoon. He asked me if I had time.
One thought that came to mind was that even though each couple had to stand in line and wait for their number to be called, there was a sense of peace and joy. Maybe it’s because these couples were simply there to celebrate marriage.
According to letsrunoff.com, some of the reasons why people elope is because it eases the stress of money and time it takes to plan a traditional wedding. Other reasons include:
- It’s more intimate.
- Easy.
- Less stress from family.
- Reduces opposition in your partner for religious/cultural reasons.
- Want a quickie wedding.
- Want a small wedding.
- Dislike attention.
My wife of 14 years would have preferred this type of matrimonial service than all the pomp and circumstance of our wedding. I didn’t listen. I wasn’t a coach back then so my listening skills weren’t as good as they are now.
So if you wanted to get married today, would you take a number?
Keith is a certified relationship coach and President of Strive 2 Succeed Coaching Services. He has over a decade of experience in the field, counseling and individuals, couples, teens and their parents to help them improve their relationships and their ability to achieve their personal goals. He works with couples to help them achieve the kind of relationship they envisioned when they first made their commitment to each other. Strengthening communication and revitalizing their understanding and empathy for each other helps couples regain the romance and closeness they long for – even in their everyday “real” world.
Having a coach is like having a GPS for life. Keith can help you get a realistic picture of where you are and focus on the best path toward your goals. Think you need a jumpstart and a plan to get back on track, call for an initial consultation at strive2succeed@comcast.net or call 201-486-4467.
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