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About ilovestrong

Keith has over a decade of experience in the field, counseling and coaching individuals, couples, teens and their parents to help them improve their relationships and their ability to achieve their personal goals. For the past seven years Keith has developed specific programs to help teens and their families achieve success in all facets of their lives that may have eluded them in the past. Academics, relationships, athletics, college preparation and applications, goal setting and developing specific plans are areas where working with Keith as a Coach can help young people set the patterns that promise a brilliant future. He works with couples to help them achieve the kind of relationship they envisioned when they first made their commitment to each other. Strengthening communication and revitalizing their understanding and empathy for each other helps couples regain the romance and closeness they long for – even in their everyday “real” world. Having a coach is like having a GPS for life. Keith can help you get a realistic picture of where you are and focus on the best path forward toward your goals. Unlike counseling, coaching focuses on the future, not the past.

Here Are 5 Reasons To Choose Being Single, Than In a Bad Relationship.

Did you know this past January 8th, the first Monday of the New Year, is considered “Divorce Day.”  It’s the day where individuals that already cracks in their relationship inquire about divorce because the holidays are now over.

Even though most individuals that are ecstatic to no longer have the albatross around their neck, some of you  after a few days of singleness are contemplating your decision.

I’m here to tell you, do not be discouraged with your decision. Click here to read 5 Reasons Why Choosing To Be Single is Better Than A Bad Relationship.

 

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Posted by on January 11, 2018 in Uncategorized

 

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Defend These 10 Vows If You Want To Make Your Marriage Last.

Defense is the action of defending or resisting attack. Yet, as men, we often feel that we don’t need to be on guard for anything especially when it comes to marriage.

On the other hand, women not only are they on guard for the things that happen in their marriage, they are on guard about everything that happen in their lives.

Men, for those of us that watch and understand sports, we know that defense is very vital important part of the game. It’s the only way you win. We all know the phrases, “A good defense beats a good offense.” “Offense wins games, defense wins championships.”

If a fruitful long lasting relationship is what we desire, then we must realize that at some point our relationship will come under attack. In order to win, we must apply these 10 principles to ensure our marriages last.

  1. Defend against not knowing your spouse

So we must understand your partner’s strengths and weaknesses as well as your own. Pushing and encouraging your spouse to be great can be very difficult if you don’t know your own. Marriages can be challenging when you are constantly focusing on your partner’s weaknesses.

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  1. Defend against not supporting or protecting her freedom.

We must understand that even though we both need and enjoy our spouse and vice versa, it’s also important for us to maintain our individuality. In particular, we need to feel like the decisions we’re making are truly coming from us. According to John Knee in the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, when people feel forced or coerced into making choices — like they didn’t have any real choice in the matter — they’re less happy and less fulfilled. And, as you might have guessed, that lack of happiness is problematic for relationships.

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  1. Defend against not voicing your wishes, desires, fears and dreams.

We must understand that we have needs, fears and desires outside of our spouse. Our partners will never fully deeply understand us if we never voice them. It’s that lack of deep connection the leads to our relationships ending.

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  1. Defend against sacrificing your needs out of obligation just to make her happy.

Once you figure out what your needs are, discuss with your partner how your needs can be met. This can be easier said than done because your spouse will have her own needs and it may come in direct conflict with yours.  So be aware that fulfilling your needs will involve difficult sacrifices on her part.

Make sure that when you do make sacrifices you do it only with love and care, and not with reluctance or resentment. If can’t make sacrifices for the right reasons, it’s probably better not to make the sacrifice at all.

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  1. Defend against not being there for your spouse when she needs you.

Your partner will rely on you the most for support. If you aren’t there when she is distressed or that soft place to fall, she will find someone else to do it. Rather it’s other women or another man. Then she will begin to think. What does she need you for?

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  1. Defend against not nurturing her goals and ambitions; supporting her through misfortune and celebrating triumphs.

Your partner wants to feel support when it comes to taking risks. There is nothing more secure when your partner can go out and conquer their goals, and there is a cheerleader pushing them and congratulating them.

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  1. Defend against a boring, passionless marriage. 

It’s no secret that couples are happier when they engage in new, interesting things together. You are basically telling your partner that you promise not to let your relationship fall into a rut.  We’re going to keep dating each other, keep travelling and exploring together, and keep sharing novel and interesting experiences with each other for the rest of your lives

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  1. Defend against bailing when times get tough.

This is where the better or worse come in; in other words, to stay committed to each other. When a couple sees themselves as a permanent partnership, their perspective on problems tends to shift from being about battling against each other to being about “ride together or die”. Having this type of commitment helps people to stop treating conflicts as all-or-nothing, instead keeping the wellbeing of your partner and your relationship in mind. Acting as a team, puts you in a better position to face challenges together.

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  1. Defend against callousness and unfairness because, you are a team now and for always.

In other words your marriage isn’t about carefully keeping score to ensure that we’re each contributing to the relationship fairly and equally. Instead, you’re promising to always strive to contribute what you can, based on the needs of your partner. You have to trust that your respective efforts will more or less balance out in the long run.

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  1. Defend against taking your marriage for granted.

When you appreciate your partner, you’re happier and more committed to the relationship. When you express gratitude to your partner, they feel more appreciated, and that makes them just as happy and just as committed. So promise to never take each other for granted, but rather to appreciate what you have and express early and often.

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These ten things are the best defense to the offensive attacks that can ruin your marriage over the long haul. As Osho says, “The fully matured man has no fear defense; he is completely open and vulnerable.”

Keith Dent is a relationship, life coach at www.strive2succeedcoaching.com . He has appeared on sites like Your Tango, The Good Men Project, MamMia and The Real Dad’s Network and is the author of the upcoming book In The Paint – How to Win at the Game of Love.

 
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Posted by on December 8, 2017 in In the Trenches, Uncategorized

 

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Has Your Tinder Man Fallen in Love with You? Here Are The 7 Signs!

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Finding Love on Tinder is minefield that most people don’t want to enter.

If you are lucky enough to meet a nice guy, have meaningful conversations that lead to, casual dates, and a few hookups, it has a chance to develop into a relationship.

Love is an entirely different thing. You want to be clear that this relationship you are building is something that can become sustainable. Click here to read the 7 signs that his feelings for you is turning into something more.

 
 

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Raising Boys Is Hard, But I’m Still Thankful I Got The Job.

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I always thought  raising a teenage daughter would be challenging. From empowering her to be the best she can be to making sure she doesn’t get hurt by some boy or man. I had a lot to worry about.

To read more about why raising boys is hard, click here.
 
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Posted by on November 29, 2017 in Parenthood, Uncategorized

 

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Feed Her Love – #EmpowermentWednesday

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Is your love catered to her tastes? It’s common to give love the way we want to receive love. But your love language probably doesn’t match hers. If you are not sure if yours match, here is a way to find out.

If you would rather be more direct, ask this question: “Honey, do you feel the depth of my love? Not do you know it, but do you feel it? If not, how can I nourish your soul?”

Do you realize your love is crucial to her survival? It’s no secret many women feel malnourished by their husbands. Their closets may be stuffed with clothes and pantry stocked with food, but their souls are famished for attention and craving emotional sustenance from the one who promised to love them until “death do us part.”

Excerpt taken from: UNCOMMEN: Coach Brian Goins
 
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Posted by on November 1, 2017 in Empowerment Wednesday

 

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Marriage – Your #1 Priority

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On #EmpowermentWednesday, making marriage your top priority can be a difficult one, especially will all the other distractions in your life: work, kids, politics, fantasy football.

Think about what 3 actions you need to take in order for your marriage to be at the top of your to-do list.

If you like this quote, please share with other family & friends that need to read this today.

Coach Keith

If you feel this is an ongoing struggle for you and you what that to change, please contact Coach Keith at info@strive2succeedcoaching.com for a free 10-30 minute consultation.
 
 

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How Do You Admit Your Marriage Failed?

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In a new memoir, “It Takes Two: Our Story,  Property Brothers star, Jonathan Scott, isn’t shy about how he contributed to his divorce.

He states that “I think when you are young and you don’t really know what you want in life, you can commit to something and think at the time it is right.”

Most people give many reasons why they get divorce from infidelity, not having the same  vision,  to loss of intimacy, even finances. One thing is clear, we usually will blame the other person for the reason our marriages fail.

In #LOVETOPICTUESDAY, if you are one that has been divorced how did you contribute to the demise of your marriage? What tips could you give others that are on the verge of ending their marriage?

If you are unsure of the direction of your marriage and you need clarity, please contact me for a free 30 minute consultation at info@strive2succeedcoaching.com.

 

Sincerely,

 

Coach Keith

 
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Posted by on October 24, 2017 in Uncategorized

 

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