Championship Week in my opinion is better than the NCAA tournament because it gives every Division 1 team that has a conference tournament the opportunity to participate in ‘Big Dance’. Your won-loss record of the regular season bears no weight on the opportunity to advance to the NCAA tournament. If you win your tournament you’re in.
Case in point, George Washington holds the distinction of qualifying for the NCAA tournament with the worst record. In 1961, their record was 9-16. The great thing about that is they earned the opportunity to participate because they came together as a team in that moment. When you get a chance to play, anything can happen.
This is what “Marriage Madness” is all about, the opportunity to play and WIN. As we prepare, to participate in the big dance, take this time to forget about your past losses, your lack of participating as a team when it comes to finances, or you lack of skill or knowledge. Start today!!
In preparation do these 3 things before our “Marriage Monday” selection show.
- Take today’s survey (see link) and last Monday’s survey if you haven’t done so. Take Our Survey!
- What’s holding you back from being honest with your partner about finances?
- What’s the first step you can take to start the process toward participating in “Marriage Madness.”
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Brandon Davies, a key contributor to the BYU basketball team was suspended for the remainder of the season due to violating the school’s moral code. Upon hearing the news, BYU promptly got blown out in their next game. Since Davies was the 3rd leading scorer and top rebounder on the team, his abscence will more than likely derail the school’s chances @ winning the title. It happens every year, an injury here, a suspension there affects the team’s run at a national title.
Likewise, if either you are your partner isn’t fully committed to competing in Marriage Madness it will derail your opportunity at possibly winning the Marriage Madness title and gaining Financial Freedom. After reading the last few blogs you still aren’t completely focused, what can you do to correct it?
The goal of competing in Marriage Madness is appropriately stated in the book Financially Ever After by Jeff Opdyke. The goal is to help:
- Understand personal finance in the context of family, instead of operating as if you are single.
- Help you realize you face a rash of money issues neither of you contemplated while dating (and if you did contemplate them, you recognize that you were – and likely still are – too intimidated to broach the topic without fear of a money fight);
- Or, you are trying to figure out how to operate financially, how you both use money and how you both communicate with one another about money.
As the coach of BYU will tell his players..I as your coach will tell you, the only chance you have at winning is playing the games and playing to win.
In order to get ready for this MADNESS, we compete during Championship Week. To get an automatic bid, to the “Dance” you have to win your conference tournament. You can prepare to win Marriage Madness with an overview of how to sustain a healthy marriage with sound Financial principles.
I came across this great article from the National Healthy Marriage Resource Center to get our mindset right.
I hope the answers to these questions help you plan for the work ahead.
I know you make think this is a typo, but for the month of March I am declaring it “Marriage Madness.” I am going to incorporate my love for college basketball with my love of relationships/marriage. I love NCAA tournament so much that I usually take the first two days off to watch as many games as possible. It’s a wonderful experience watching the last second shots and the underdog messing up everyone’s tourney bracket (including my own) until ultimately a champion is crowned.
In all seriousness as part of “Marriage Madness” I am going to focus specifically on one topic that can really leave our relationship in a state of madness, our finances. As a relationship coach, I am going to prep my couples as if you were players on my team. I will post one blog about the topic on the today and next week in preparation for Monday March 14th, the week of the tournament. Then I will post specific topics and exercises that will help you as a couple get on track so you can win the ultimate prize, The Best Marriage in the Country.
In order to prep for the tournament,click on the link for our survey. The survey will give you an idea of the topics that you need to discuss as a couple. The survey is not meant to make you uncomfortable, but to open the lines of communication. Answer the series of questions based on a scale of 1-10 with 10 being the best.
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Team, I look forward to going into battle with you to win the ultimate crown. Financial Freedom in our Marriages.
“A good relationship has a pattern like a dance and is built on some of the same rules. The partners do not need to hold on tightly, because they move confidently in the same pattern, intricate but gay and swift and free, like a country dance of Mozart’s.” – Anne Morrow Lindbergh
When we get married, we expect our marriages and the roles we create should be a certain way. For example, the man should be the provider, the woman the caretaker. If you try to hold onto those roles when it may not be what is needed to make your home thrive can be a source of stress and a challenge in your relationship.
In your marriage, both of you should come to some a AGREEMENT about what you desire and expect from the other person. A good way to do this is through a Family Mission Statement.
Last week, we gave you the symptoms for Weekend Relationship Syndrome.
I hope you found that you didn’t suffer from this disease. If you did, don’t worry, you aren’t alone.
One of the by-products of this illness is the negative energy that flows all around you and your marriage. The first step to eliminating this is to bring positive energy back into your relationship. Here are 4 energy boosters needed for you to get you back on track.
- Take care of yourself as individuals. – If we tend to not feel good about ourselves, we will normally voice that to our partners. Instead, we will deflect our pain onto them. STOP THAT! Figure out what you need to do to take care of yourself before you take care of the relationship.
- Break free of old habits. – Your relationship can get into a rut, especially if you always do the same things, argue the same way, or go out to the same places. Exploring and learning new things can spice up any relationship.
- Make intimacy a priority. – Hugs can do a lot to break down intimacy barriers. Make a point to start there then find different ways of touching in order to create positive energy.
- Make it a point to not say and do anything to deliberately injure the relationship. A person that is careful will “measure twice, cut once.” Being deliberate not to hurt your partner takes strength and planning. Work together to design a strategy on how you will interact with each other in times of conflict or pain.
Following this prescription will help cure a case of Weekend Relationship Syndrome and create the positive energy flow needed for a sucess.
Here are 5 symptoms that will let you know if you have Weekend Marriage Syndrome?
- When you are barking about the fact the morning coffee wasn’t made rather than kissing your partner good morning.
- When your time spent together during the week consists of a headnod of acknowldegement in separate cars on your way to work.
- When the last gift you purchased for your partner was a personal hygiene product at the grocery store that you forgot to buy last week.
- When date night consists of a picnic at your child’s sporting event.
- When making love becomes a check-off so it doesn’t remain as another item on the to-do list.
If you suffer from this disease, there is HOPE. Contact Coach Keith immediately to help restore some balance in your relationship, reclaim the love and intimacy that has been missing, and remember the reason why you came together in the first place.
Continue reading Do you have Weekend Relationship Syndrome?
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