As the East Coast braces for Hurricane Sandy today and tomorrow, I can’t help but wonder how many marriages are taking on hurricane-like tendencies as I write.
What is a hurricane? According to FEMA – A hurricane is a type of tropical cyclone or severe tropical storm that forms in the southern Atlantic Ocean, Caribbean Sea, Gulf of Mexico, and in the eastern Pacific Ocean. A typical cyclone is accompanied by thunderstorms, and in the Northern Hemisphere, a counterclockwise circulation of winds near the earth’s surface.
Some issues that can constantly swirl out of control and create widespread damage in your marriage are:
- Constantly arguing about issues and getting no where
- Constant negativity
- Having long periods of not speaking to each other
- Talking about divorce due to irreconcilable differences, money problems or dealing with infidelity
Like Hurricane Sandy which is on track to affect approximately 60 million people, the high winds and heavy rainfall of negativity in your marriage can have not just long-lasting damage to you as a couple, but can deeply affect your kids, your family and friends and your job.
Hurricanes in marriage are inevitable, so what precautions can you take to minimize the damage.
- To begin preparing, you should build an emergency kit and make a family communications plan. – Have someone you can go to for support. Sometimes you can’t see past the problems that a certified coach, or an unbiased person can see.
- Know your surroundings. – Take a step back and see how the negativity in your marriage is affects others. Looking at your marriage from a different perspective may help you fix things faster.
- Learn community hurricane evacuation routes and how to find higher ground. Determine where you would go and how you would get there if you needed to evacuate. – Find a place that is peaceful and tranquil that the two of you can go. The positive atmosphere can change your view in your marriage.
- Make plans to secure your property – Above all else, hunker down in your marriage because outside forces will try to step in and destroy what you have taken the time to build.
- Be sure trees and shrubs around your home are well-trimmed so they are more wind resistant. – Cut off the negative things that are causing problems in your marriage. i.e. if you are constantly arguing make a plan to affirm your partner until it becomes second nature.
- Install a generator for emergencies. – A little electricity(i.e. more sex) in your marriage can jumpstart everything.
- Consider building a safe room. – Individually find a safe place that you can go to help you calm down, meditate, pray in order to bring clarity to the situation.
What other preparations can couples take to reduce the storms in their marriage?
I would love to hear from other Strivers? Stay dry and more important of all stay safe?