There are many reasons why people are having affairs. According to private investigators featured in Friday Night’s 20/20 Caught in a Bad Romance, they see just as many women as men stepping out on their partners. Several reasons people have affairs are for excitement, adventure, revenge, companionship, attention or just plain lust. In essence the reason for the affair can be wrapped up in one single sentence. MY RELATIONSHIP ISN’T HEALTHY, THEREFORE MY SEX LIFE ISN’T HEALTHY.
In our society, sex is considered the pinnacle of our relationships. An excellent article on WEBMD’s website reflects the reasons why people have sex. It’s mostly around selfish reasons and not for the good of the relationship. In reality, sex should be used as a barometer for the relationship, not the indicator. Your sex lives should be good and healthy because your relationship reflects the same thing. On the flip side, if your sex life is one-sided, it’s because your relationship is also one-sided. Let me make something clear, I didn’t say sex should be plentiful. If you have a family and a job, the odds that you are “hittin’ it” every night or every weekend for that matter is unrealistic. But when you do have sex, it should be enjoyable and satisfying for both you and your partner.
In the book Rescuing your Love Life by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend, the Hebrew word for “having sex” means “to know”. In order to have a healthy sex life, you must truly know your partner.
How do you truly know the person you wake up next to every day? Over the next four days, we will examine how you must know your partner in the most intimate way, absent from fear, shame, hurt, or guilt. So we can get back to having healthy sex lives.