A “New” Attitude – The Makeover of Relationships

When we often think of a makeover we think about a new wardrobe, cosmetic surgery, or any minor adjustment that will help us feel better about ourselves on the outside. But do we ever think about a relationship makeover? No! We automatically assume that the individual adjustments to our teeth, tummy or our breasts will bring the man of our dreams, when in fact it’s our attitudes about dating and relationships that are the main cause of our obstacles in the first place.

Some of the common attitudes about dating are as follows:

  • There are no good men out there.
  • Of the few good men that are available, they are either married or gay.
  • Men don’t want to settle down, the just want to hit it and keep it movin’.

Have you ever really sat down and wondered where your thoughts about relationships come from? Your attitudes about relationships start to develop before you are even born. According to John Maxwell’s book Attitude 101, there are 6 stages where you develop certain characteristics that impact your attitude.

The first characteristic is your personality. There are four basic temperaments that shape how you view things, Sanguine (extroverted), Choleric (a doer), Melancholic (a perfectionist), Phlegmatic (self-content, kind).

The next characteristic is your environment. Our environment is the first challenger of our belief system. For example, even if we have a positive outlook about relationships, but we live in an environment that challenges that idea, it will begin to chip away at our beliefs.

The final characteristic is what moments we remember in past relationships. If you constantly hear negative words during a tumultuous relationship, they will linger long after the physical pain of the break up.

To start the Makeover process, you must peel away the layers of negativity.

What negative emotions are you holding on to? I would love to hear from you.

Coach Keith

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Keith has over a decade of experience in the field, counseling and coaching individuals, couples, teens and their parents to help them improve their relationships and their ability to achieve their personal goals. For the past seven years Keith has developed specific programs to help teens and their families achieve success in all facets of their lives that may have eluded them in the past. Academics, relationships, athletics, college preparation and applications, goal setting and developing specific plans are areas where working with Keith as a Coach can help young people set the patterns that promise a brilliant future. He works with couples to help them achieve the kind of relationship they envisioned when they first made their commitment to each other. Strengthening communication and revitalizing their understanding and empathy for each other helps couples regain the romance and closeness they long for – even in their everyday “real” world. Having a coach is like having a GPS for life. Keith can help you get a realistic picture of where you are and focus on the best path forward toward your goals. Unlike counseling, coaching focuses on the future, not the past.

3 thoughts on “A “New” Attitude – The Makeover of Relationships”

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